Change is the Only Constant

Minutes ago I was talking about change with the director of the school. Discussing how most people can or wont change.  That without their current familiar problems to identify themselves they are left lost and unsure of who they are.  Personally I love change, or at least I think I do.  But how does change help me in the confusing situation I am in.  I'm finding myself in this place, emotionally attached to someone I probably shouldn't be for many reasons.  And I'm not blaming him for anything, I'm the only one to blame for how I feel and where I am.  This may not make much sense to you but I needed to write it. 

Yesterday I had made the official decision to stay away until late June or early July, but today I'm rethinking that. What will it do to benefit me?  Will I just continue to spend money I don't have, not paint, not learn enough Spanish and in the process develop a broken heart? Should I just cut my ties now and flee?  I wish I knew.  I also wish I knew what happened to the brick wall that used to surround my heart.  What happened to the protector part of my personality?  Did he go on vacation and decide not to come back too? 

In the mean time, here are some photos from my recent trip to Panama!

The Hostel

My New Casa in Panama

View from the Horse

Panama

On My Horse

My Horse, Colorado

Hot Spring Relaxing!